Dear Santa
You have ignored my requests in 2008 and 2009. But people do not call me a Bitch for nothing. I don’t give up, don’t give in and I am certainly not giving up on you. Plus, I am addicted to fabulous presents.
I just received the latest Jimmy Choo newsletter. The newsletter pushed my bodily fluids upwards and released it through my brown colored eyes in a not so fabulous way.
It is a sad indeed. A Fabulous Bitch who cries on a sunny Friday morning does not make for a pretty picture.
But I can’t help myself. The Cruise 2011 collection left me in want, salivating and bitchy sad. I want what I can’t afford. How sad is that? Luckily, you are Santa and you can make it happen for me.
Santa, please take note of my fab wish list and make it happen for me. You have no excuse, really. You have more than a month left to make this Fab Bitch a Deliriously Happy Fab Bitch. And you owe me.
Not gonna make any promises I have no intention to keep, that is not a bitch way. Just be a Bitch Fab Santa and get the Jimmy’s to Windhoek, ok?
I don’t even like yellow. The Jimmy people call it ‘lime’. I am gonna accept the ‘lime’ as color description. Whatever.
I am planning to use this X-mas gift (yes, I am so bitch positive) and make a chocolate man very happy and make his X-mas very merry. Cause I am going to wear Magnum and nothing else on a very intimate date. Magnum does not need anything else. It is that Bitch Fab.
Oh Lily! I don’t need to explain. Really, you don’t get it? No wonder you have not changed your outfit in a million plus years. Just give me the Lily. And I will make some chocolate male going lily chilly with lust.
Shut up. I can do glam. Glam comes easy for any Fab Bitch.
And Bitch Fab can pull off the reptile look. Easy!
The bangle detail is just absolutely irresistible. Don’t believe me? Just check out the picture below. Santa I am not talking about the legs. Focus the eyes on the bag.
There you have it old man *Santa in red. I was even nice enough to give you some legs to goggle over. Now, just do your X-mas magic and we will be even. If not, just remember I know people who know people and you might find yourself in a difficult position. No cookies and milk for the whole of Christmas 2010.
xoxo
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